So had my first 24hr Prayer vigil this week was a nice experience and would do it again, though probably not for a while.
Some thoughts came to me over the course of the day and I thought I'd jot them down to preserve them for the annals of time.
First of all this passage, which is one of my favourites, stuck in my head and sort of set the theme for night.
Isaiah 6
A Vision of God in the Temple
In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord sitting on a throne, high and lofty; and the hem of his robe filled the temple. Seraphs were in attendance above him; each had six wings: with two they covered their faces, and with two they covered their feet, and with two they flew. And one called to another and said:
‘Holy, holy, holy is the Lord of hosts;
the whole earth is full of his glory.’
The pivots on the thresholds shook at the voices of those who called, and the house filled with smoke. And I said: ‘Woe is me! I am lost, for I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips; yet my eyes have seen the King, the Lord of hosts!’
‘Holy, holy, holy is the Lord of hosts;
the whole earth is full of his glory.’
The pivots on the thresholds shook at the voices of those who called, and the house filled with smoke. And I said: ‘Woe is me! I am lost, for I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips; yet my eyes have seen the King, the Lord of hosts!’
Then one of the seraphs flew to me, holding a live coal that had been taken from the altar with a pair of tongs. The seraph touched my mouth with it and said: ‘Now that this has touched your lips, your guilt has departed and your sin is blotted out.’ Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, ‘Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?’
And I said,
‘Here I am Lord; send me!’
2:46am - My faith is anger and passion. Anger at the way Christianity is used to justify hate, violence and oppression. Anger at the reluctance of the church to make a change, to stay silent and put down.
Passion to make a change - to proclaim sight to the blind, to set the captives free and to proclaim the year of the Lord's favour.
Two others join me, brothers in Christ, silently pray with me. One is new to faith, one is close to me. We are all different, have different relationships to God but are united here.
I start to ask God does he still want me as a priest as it's no longer clear to me the thoughts turn round to me desperately wanting to be a priest and i end up no longer asking but screaming like Isaiah "Here I am lord; send me!"
5:00am - The birds start to sing and the sunrises, I start to repent.
I pray alongside 3 of my sisters. This is a different kind of relationship to that with my brothers, tea is made love is shared and support is acknowledged as opposed to the stern, unspoken love between brothers. I pray for equality between people, Gender, sex, race and class. "There they are Lord; send them!"
7:00am - More people come to pray. We make each other cups of tea and one brings in vegan sausage sandwiches for breakfast. There is laughter, love and fellowship. We experience Joy in our shared faith. The silence and stillness brings us together. "Here we are Lord; send us"
8:50am - I am joined by an old colleague, some one I cared incredibly deeply for. She has received some bad news, and her life feels like it is being held back. I share in her pain. "here she is lord; send her!"
2:46pm - Funny how spending so much time in silence can bring you closer to each other as well as God. We each have expereinced the call from God to do something about the world, no matter how big or small a change we wish to see we all want to do it.
"here I am lord; send me!"
Passion to make a change - to proclaim sight to the blind, to set the captives free and to proclaim the year of the Lord's favour.
Two others join me, brothers in Christ, silently pray with me. One is new to faith, one is close to me. We are all different, have different relationships to God but are united here.
I start to ask God does he still want me as a priest as it's no longer clear to me the thoughts turn round to me desperately wanting to be a priest and i end up no longer asking but screaming like Isaiah "Here I am lord; send me!"
5:00am - The birds start to sing and the sunrises, I start to repent.
I pray alongside 3 of my sisters. This is a different kind of relationship to that with my brothers, tea is made love is shared and support is acknowledged as opposed to the stern, unspoken love between brothers. I pray for equality between people, Gender, sex, race and class. "There they are Lord; send them!"
7:00am - More people come to pray. We make each other cups of tea and one brings in vegan sausage sandwiches for breakfast. There is laughter, love and fellowship. We experience Joy in our shared faith. The silence and stillness brings us together. "Here we are Lord; send us"
8:50am - I am joined by an old colleague, some one I cared incredibly deeply for. She has received some bad news, and her life feels like it is being held back. I share in her pain. "here she is lord; send her!"
2:46pm - Funny how spending so much time in silence can bring you closer to each other as well as God. We each have expereinced the call from God to do something about the world, no matter how big or small a change we wish to see we all want to do it.
"here I am lord; send me!"
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